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For some time now I have studied what makes folks successful. I remember in high school reading both Lee Iaccoca’s Bio and the story of Sam Walton. I read a lot of Bios back then and still enjoy them when given the chance. These days I tend to read more about leadership than I do of monetary success stories.  In the last week I have seen a couple of stories of success that have peeked my interest.

There is this awesome lifestyle and brand photographer Leigh Caraccioli. I met her one time 6 months ago and have been infected with her enthusiasm and her photography.  Meeting her and Amanda Hite was like meeting two rock stars. You hear people say, “when I get famous I want so and so to take my picture.” I am pretty sure Leigh capturing you on film will make you famous.  I am saving my nickles now to hire her in the not so distant future.

Anyways, the other day I was reading her blog at the uber cool Talent Revolution and had an ah hah moment.

Telling a story about a blind woman with real vision Leigh bares her soul to the reader. She shares her fears and shares her joy in discovering her real inner eye. It is that inner eye that she believes makes up for her lack of technical expertise.  Here’s how it went down. Leigh is telling us that she is not a technical photographer. She glosses over the geektype details of taking a good picture that bores most of us and scares us away from a good camera. She says it this way:

As a photographer, vision counts. We assess the light, ISO, the f/stop, aperture based on what we see from within our view finder. I won’t lie. I suck at mechanics.

I believe her inner eye is deeper than that. My moment came when she says:

Elizabeth taught me how I see better blind. In a way I’m lucky to be blind, unencumbered by the mechanics of a tool I hold in my hand to capture my subjects. It allows me to see people I photograph purely. To feel them. Take these little boys for example. After being told a dozen times to behave, stand still, hush these fellas gladly embarked in a mock karate bout with me. We shared a secret “you can karate chop me if you want but don’t let the grown ups catch us” moment. And then, they let down their guard with me enabling me to see them be themselves. They just wanted to play and laugh out loud.

Do you see it? Do you? Here is the photo. Its right there. In their posture, in their eyes, in their smile. That photo couldn’t have ever been taken by me with any brand of quality of equipment. Heck Anne Leibovitz couldn’t have taken that shot. Leigh got the photo because she was not the photographer. She was their friend. She was the adult who played with them and let them break the rules. She had a relationship with the boys.

In this one picture, which I hope to buy and frame, Leigh shares the secret of success for politicians, fundraisers, business people, clergy, teachers, writers, artists and others. Its not about the technical know how. Its about relationships.

When I speak with development professionals and fundraisers, my line of work, they talk about relationship building. The most successful professionals using social media are relational people. In every success story and failure story, the lynch pin of every great story is the relationships between people.

Earlier this week I watched a video interview with Jonathon Acuff, the writer behind Stuff Christians Like.  His success is because of his relationships with great leaders in the church and his readers.  He is not a rocket scientist nor does he hold a PH.D. in comparative English Lit, he just writes what he knows to an audience he knows and appreciates. He invites their comments and suggestions through that relationship he has become wildly successful in his endeavors.  Few writers have that ability. You ever read a novel and feel like you know the characters or you think you know the author. Its because those words, those pages, formed a relationship with you. Ever feel that way about your tenth grade Physics book. Nope. Because its technical.

What do I take away from this for my self. Relationships matter. Perhaps they are more important than any technical skill set.  The million dollar question is this: How do I gain success, however defined, by leveraging my relationships?

The 1o million dollar question: How do I use my relationships to make others successful? However they define it.